Truth Joy Beauty

Just my thoughts and reflections about living and loving in the post-post modern age.

It’s a Love-lution!

Ever notice that Love is the word Evolve backwards but with another EV tagged on the end. That is EVLOVE. (Evolve spelt backwards.) Interesting? Maybe. Significant? Possibly? Who knows. But, it did get me thinking. Love…is kind of like evolution. In that, in order to truly love another we must be pretty evolved creatures. Only humans show this kind of love. Yes some animals mate for life, and perhaps, that is a kind of primitive love, but I am talking mainly however about the kind of love, and there are many kinds, that binds us to another person and makes us feel that they are worth sharing our lives with intimately. We meet so many people over the course of our lives, what makes one person stand out from the others, what makes us say…Hey you. I like you. I love you. I choose you. It starts with feelings, emotions…those intangibles that have us scrambling for words when we are asked the question, What do you see in him/her? 
Love, like beauty is in the eye of the beholder for sure. It is a question worth asking yourself however when faced with overpowering emotions such as attraction, lust, desire, delirium and intense like. Never underestimate the power of liking someone or something. Likeability is an underrated quality in a partner. How often have you heard the question posed, You love them, but do you really like them? If you are looking for a long term partner, you are very smart to want to like them a lot before you decide to love them. 
I guess that’s where love truly starts. Liking someone. You know, you just like (and I don’t mean Facebook like!) them. Want to be around them, talk to them, spend time with them and interact with them. It can sometimes be a little thing that just makes you go ‘wow’. I knew a man once and one of the things I used to love about him was the way he spoke, kind of slow and measured. He would drawl his thoughts into existence with every word chosen very carefully. It made want to just sit there and talk to him for as long as I could. The thing I like the most my favourite person of all time is the way he always makes me laugh, despite myself. No matter how dire, or how depressing something is, he will always find a way to make me laugh about it. I love that about him. 
But going from just liking someone a lot to deep love and attachment is another thing altogether. To do that, I think, one must evolve from a single minded, basically selfish entity to one that has the other’s best interests at heart before anything else. Not that easy, let me tell you. I have heard it said, many times, one must love themselves before they can truly love another person so perhaps that is what is needed in order to move up the ladder of love-volution.
Love thyself, or know thyself, and then you can move that love outward into the world and love someone else. And when you find the one you love, there is nothing like time spent with that person. Time spent together in the world is more precious than any gift, word or token of affection. After all time is all we have to give when all is said and done, the most precious gift we can give another. Our time and attention. Love is built on those two simple things.

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